The hard times of life

I recently read a post by Petals of Perfection about "Why it's ok not to be ok...".
It's a subject that often crosses my mind but I've never written about it. We all have these particular moments when we feel not so good and we - unfortunately - have the tendency of closing ourselves and hiding our feelings.

Me, I've always had a low self-esteem (responsible for my 10 years depression) and lack of auto confidence which made me close my doors to the world and the world's doors to myself. I've almost turned into a wild scary creature apart from society ,  but I was lucky enough to find a way out (I'll give depression subject a proper post later).
My point is I know how it feels like when you go down to the very bottom. I know the panic, the insecurity, the terror it gives you not being able to find the right path.


However in the top of my 21 years of existence I also know how much life changes - for better! Specially when you become an adult and get to live your life by yourself.

Since I turned 18 and got out from my parents home,  my life changed dramatically. I moved to the capital of my country, I went to University,  I left it as I couldn't afford it, I started working,  I started dating (had my first bf at 18), it went wrong,  I had surgery, I went back to my parents home in the north and stayed there until I turned 20 and moved to London. New city, new country, everything changed and I met Habibi in the meanwhile.

All this happened without my exact planning. My pain during all that time before didn't really have a reason to exist as nothing happened.
All I wanted was to be a dancer and have a good life.  Did it happen? Nope (I haven't given up yet).

So all of this to pass you this message that I try to teach myself everyday.

Don't suffer too much. Don't plan too much.

Go easy on yourself!

Enjoy life as much as you can,  you're not 20yo twice. Be crazy if you want to. Be serious when you're expected to.

Ashamed of the Past? 
Accept it and put it aside (we learn good lessons from it but we don't need to be constantly reminding ourselves of that one stupid thing that happened).
Worried about the Future? 
That's ok, make your plans (generally)  but remember you don't know exactly what is going to happen tomorrow. There's no way you can define your future steps.

Actually the only way to make a good future is by making the best out of your Present.

So do it,  enjoy it, and surely better times will come.

Xoxo,