Worries about the future

I think there is nothing worst for the soul than suffering in advance for something that might not even happen. It's like an endless escape from a terrible nightmare.
Well... that's one of my problems.

I remember when I was younger and I couldn't be happy due to all the pressure I used to put on myself. It can be really tough, but one of the biggest steps towards reaching happiness is to learn to accept and learn with the past, enjoy and think in the present, and calmly deal with the future as it comes.
However this is a big lesson that you get to learn during all your life and sometimes it seems impossible to think rationally.


In the last weeks I've been quite down thinking about my future in all aspects.
I'm not sure about how I'm going to achieve some of the goals I've had for a long time, as they require a big amount of money that I don't think I'll be able to spend as soon as I would like to - much more important things to pay for, to be honest.

Not sure either about the future of my dancing career, the one and only career that could make me feel completely happy and accomplished. This is something only artists are able to understand, as it is a very deep feeling of wanting to innovate, create and express, even with your own body.

Last but not less important, worried about my future with Habibi. Afraid that one day everything will change, afraid that some day he will turn into that bad guy of so many stories that we hear, although I know him well enough to know he is not like that - at all.
Afraid as well that he will stop loving me or respecting me. Actually afraid that he will change me for another girl that will be more seductive, more beautiful, with the most amazingly perfect body, without all the complex that I own. Someone so "sweet" and so "cute", someone that will be his "baby" by the time I arrive to my 40s.

Well, things that I know I shouldn't worry about. We are still so young and still so fresh when it comes to relationships, both of us. None of us had a real relationship like the one we have together now. None of us had the opportunity to love and be loved as now.
Maybe I don't really have reasons to worry, maybe it's just my teenager's side coming up.

Should I just give him the best of myself and accept all the joy he brings to my life.